We Have 6 Kids—Here Are 5 Things That Make Bedtime Easier

If you're here because you watched my husband chase our children up the stairs like a pack of prey... welcome.

Apparently, "Go get in bed" was too boring, so somewhere along the way Austin started giving the kids a ten-second head start before chasing them upstairs.

The slowest child gets caught and carried to bed.

Natural selection.

And somehow, bedtime with six kids is actually one of the smoother parts of our day.

The chase definitely helps—but I think the bigger reason is that we've always tried to make bedtime something our kids feel good about, while also creating a routine that leaves very little room for bedtime to unravel.

Here are five things that have worked really well for us.

1. We've Never Used Bed as a Punishment

This is probably the most important one.

We've never said:

"If you keep acting like that, you're going to bed."

Or:

"If you don't stop, you're going to have to take a nap."

We've always talked about sleep as something good that your body needs, not something bad that happens when you misbehave.

If you're exhausted, your body needs rest. If you're cranky because you're tired, sleep isn't the consequence for being cranky—it's something that will help you feel better.

We don't want our kids to associate their beds with punishment. Bed is comfortable. Rest is good. Sleep helps your body grow and gives you energy for tomorrow.

2. We Do Almost Everything Downstairs

This might be our most practical bedtime hack.

Our kids either put their pajamas on downstairs or change upstairs and come back down.

We've learned that sending six children upstairs with multiple instructions is basically an invitation to get distracted.

Someone starts playing. Someone wanders into a sibling's room. Someone completely forgets why they went upstairs in the first place.

So when we finally send everyone upstairs for the night, they're actually ready to get into bed.

3. All Six Toothbrushes Live in Our Kitchen

Yes. The kitchen.

We keep all of the kids' toothbrushes together in a drawer, and everyone brushes their teeth downstairs where we can see them.

Then we do "last check."

After they've brushed their own teeth, one of us quickly brushes everyone's teeth again to make sure they didn't miss anything.

No wondering whether everyone actually brushed. No sending kids back upstairs because someone forgot.

Teeth are done. Pajamas are on.

Now they're ready for the fun part.

4. We Make the Trip to Bed Fun

This is the part you saw on Instagram.

Austin gives them a ten-second head start.

Then he chases them.

Six children go screaming and laughing up the stairs, and whoever isn't fast enough gets caught and carried the rest of the way to bed.

But there's one important reason this works so well:

There's nothing left for them to do upstairs.

They aren't running upstairs to start their bedtime routine. They're running upstairs to get straight into bed.

Instead of us saying, "Guys, I've told you three times to go upstairs!" they're voluntarily sprinting there.

Apparently a small amount of fear is very motivating.

5. Bed Doesn't Always Mean Immediate Lights Out

Once they're in bed, everything slows down.

Our older elementary girls get about 15 minutes to read independently before turning off their lamps.

The boys listen to an audiobook while they're waiting for Austin to come read to them.

Then Austin takes turns reading aloud with the kids. Right now, the girls are working their way through Harry Potter, and the boys are reading The Chronicles of Narnia.

Some nights he reads to the girls. Other nights he reads to the boys.

It gives everyone something quiet and predictable to do while they wait and makes the transition from a busy house to sleep feel gradual instead of abrupt.

The Goal Isn't a Perfect Bedtime

With six kids, bedtime is not a peaceful montage every night.

Someone needs water. Someone has to tell us something very important that apparently couldn't have been mentioned during the previous twelve hours. Someone loses a stuffed animal.

But we don't have much fighting over the fact that it's time for bed.

And I think that's because we've tried to build our routine around two things:

Make bedtime feel good, and make bedtime simple.

We don't use sleep as a threat.

We don't send everyone upstairs with five things to remember.

We get pajamas on. We brush teeth. We do last check.

Then Dad starts counting.

10... 9... 8...

And six kids take off running.

Someday, nobody is going to run up those stairs anymore.

So for now, we'll take the screaming, the laughing, the stampede—and the unlucky kid who gets carried to bed.

Those are the little things I think they'll remember.